A Special Time Just for Him

One of the most painful experiences I have ever had in my lifetime is the loss of my precious dad.  When I try to describe the experience, the best way to say it is that I felt almost incomplete.  Like a little part of me was missing.  At the time I thought I’d never get over it.  But as time passed, I noticed that I was thinking about his loss less and less.  After a while, I even noticed that an entire day would pass and I hadn’t thought about him even once.  Of course, this was a welcome change from he constant grieving so I viewed it as a good thing.  But I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life never contemplating on the wonderful memories I had of him.  So I would set aside a time every now and then where I would just think about him.  But with this time the tears came with it.  But it was so worth it.  To stop and think about what a wonderful man he was and how much he loved us was so bittersweet.  Now, the times I choose to do this usually come on his birthday and on Father’s Day.  It’s something I need to do to keep his memory alive in me.

When I was a little girl there was one point in my life that I realized the sacrifice that was made for me on hill called Calvary.  It is not pleasant for me to sit down and just let my mind go through the events of those 3 days.  In fact, it brings tears.  It makes me want to just put it out of my mind.  But unless I sit and contemplate these events, the importance of these events become stagnant in my own life.  I don’t want this to happen any more than I want the memory of my own father to become a smaller part of me.  His sacrifice was big. It has made all the difference in me.  How can I take that for granted.  How can I not take this time of the year to walk that road with my precious Lord.  How can I just forget.  I can not.  This week I will be on that road with Him, at the foot of the cross as He hangs there dying, and at the opening of that tomb and He emerges resurrected and complete.